


Perpetual Motion

by goblin



Category: Askewniverse
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Piercings, Pre-Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2001-11-15
Updated: 2001-11-15
Packaged: 2017-11-03 11:10:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,011
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/380745
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/goblin/pseuds/goblin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The nose-piercing fic.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Perpetual Motion

**Author's Note:**

> DISCLAIMER: I don't own Jay and Silent Bob, although I have asked if I can have a pair for Christmas. Somehow, though, I doubt Kevin Smith, View Askew and Miramax will easily part with them.  
> DEDICATION: For starla, cos she wrote me that Jay/Brodie. Fair swap, yes?

Jay, as usual, was in perpetual motion. Fidgeting, dancing, twitching, jumping, back and forth, back and forth. Miscellaneous Jay-movement.  
Running up the down escalators and down the up escalators had finally lost its appeal. Business was slow. The mall seemed apathetic and unsparkling.  
Silent Bob looked at Jay noncommittally, then looked away.   
"I'm fuckin' bored!" Jay was nearly about to jump out of his skin. "I wanna cut my hair off."  
Bob grabbed Jay by the shoulders and forcibly kept him still. "Don't," he said.  
Jay opened his mouth to ask why not, and say Bob couldn't just forbid him to do things, and bitch about how bored he was some more. But then he saw how serious Bob was. "You're right," he said at last. "As soon as it was gone, I'd just wish I had it back. Nooch."  
Bob gave him a warning look, but let him go.  
Jay immediately began his restless jumping back and forth again. "But I gotta do _somethin'_ ," he said. "I need to buy somethin', or break somethin', or change somethin', or..." An idea unfolded in Jay's brain and came shining out his eyes. "I need to get my nose pierced!"  
Silent Bob paused, nodded, then began to amble off.  
"Motherfuck, where you goin'?"  
Bob turned around. "Drugstore," he said. And started off again.  
Jay skipped up to his side. "Dude, I am not getting' pierced at a fuckin' lame-assed drugstore, like a little girl gettin' her ears done. I'm goin' to the tattoo parlor, they do piercings there. And they got porno pictures on the walls, yeah."  
Bob changed direction, heading for the sliding glass doors.   
"Hey fatass, where you goin' now?"  
Bob patiently turned back around. "Bus," he said.  
"Oh, fuck that. Fuck that," said Jay. "I ain't waiting that long. I want it now, now, now, gimme a needle and I'll do it myself."  
"Drugstore," said Bob firmly, and changed direction once again, this time taking Jay by the shoulders to make sure he was coming along. If Jay wanted to get this done, he'd better damn well have it done properly.  
When they got to the drugstore, Jay walked straight up to the counter, leant on it and leered at the girl behind it. "I wanna get my nose pierced," he said.  
"Certainly," said the girl smoothly. "A nose piercing will cost you thirty-five dollars. That includes the piercing, the stud, and the antiseptic you'll have to put on it twice a day, every day for the first six weeks." She placed a bottle of antiseptic on the counter efficiently. "After that you can change studs if you like."  
"Antiseptic??" said Jay, somewhat outraged by this well-rehearsed spiel. "Fuck that pansy-assed shit - "  
Bob took the antiseptic, and shot Jay a look that fully indicated his intention of _making_ Jay use it.  
"Are you going to pay for that?" asked the girl calmly.  
"Fine, fine," grumbled Jay, forking out the thirty-five bucks and glaring at Silent Bob.  
"Now," said the girl, "if you'd just like to step into the back room I'll have the needle gun ready in a minute."  
"Back room, huh?" Jay raised his eyebrow at Silent Bob.  
"You can take your friend in too, if you want."  
Jay grinned at Bob, beckoned, and set off for the back room.  
Bob frowned. He hoped this wasn't going to be what Jay was hoping it was going to be.  
The girl came in, holding a needle gun, a blue felt-tipped pen, and a few other pieces of nose-piercing paraphernalia. "Which side?" she asked.  
He pointed. "Right... here."  
"Now, will you ever want to put a ring in it?" she said, dabbing at Jay's nostril with an iodined swab.  
"I don't know, maybe... why does it matter?"  
"If you want a ring in it at some point, the piercing has to be a little closer to the edge of the nostril than it would otherwise. Do you want me to put it low enough to allow for a ring?"  
"Sure," said Jay. He licked his lips nervously. His foot was tapping out an insane rhythm on the floor and his bravado was dripping away.  
"Well, I'll draw on where I'm going to pierce it, and you tell me if that's where you want it to be."  
She leaned forward and drew a little blue dot on Jay's nose. He tried to cheer himself up by looking at her tits, but it didn't work. He was still nervous.  
The girl gave him a hand mirror. "Look okay?" she asked brightly.   
Jay looked at it. "Uh, sure," he said.  
"This will all be over in a second," said the girl, turning towards the bench.   
Jay heard the snap of disposable gloves being pulled onto hands, and then the clunk of the needle gun as it left the bench.  
Bob felt the sleeve of his coat tighten, clutched in Jay's anxious fingers.  
"Ready then?" She held the gun up.  
Jay nodded, wordless for once, and swallowed.   
Bob was expecting a stream of cussing to issue forth from Jay's mouth. He was expecting anger, indignation that this should actually hurt, and perhaps some invective directed at the girl and even at Bob himself. He wasn't expecting the tiny yelp, the five-second flood of tears against his shoulder, or the several soft breaths in and out while he stroked Jay's hair.   
And then it was all over. Jay had drawn away from him and was looking in the hand mirror and exclaiming how hot he was, and asking the girl if she thought he was hot, and asking Silent Bob if he thought Jay was hot, and saying Bob was always hot for his ass anyway, pierced nose or not, the gay fuck.   
And then they were back by the base of the escalators, and Jay, once again, was in perpetual motion. Fidgeting, dancing, twitching, jumping, back and forth, back and forth. Miscellaneous Jay-movement.   
But Silent Bob remembered metal through flesh, tears through fabric, fingers through hair.   
And he knew that not everything was the same.


End file.
